But first, a twist on an old christmas classic!
It’s the most gluttonous time of the year
There’ll be much overeating
And bellies will be growing
When big meals are near
It’s the most wonderful time
It’s the most wonderful time
It’s the most wonderful time
It’s the most gluttonous time of the year
It’s not just Christmas of course, Hanukkah, you’re a creature of indulgence too, you sly old dog.
And since we no longer partake in the ancient Roman practice of vomiting after meals (PSA: In writing this article, I learned that such a practice never existed! Look it up!) Nevertheless, since we no longer partake in this fantastical practice, we should, nay, we must generate better alternatives. No, no, don’t get up! We know you’re busy eating, so we did it for you.
- Mind-body connection: Since the dawn of time, eating has been a unifying communal activity used to fulfill not only our physical appetites, but our emotional ones as well. Now more than ever, many of us enjoy more food than ever before, but, our health and waistlines have paid the price. We often seem to just eat, not feel hunger and eat, no, no, just eat. And eat, and eat.
To find your long-lost hunger, take your hand (either hand it fine), and place it upon your belly, ask yourself: “Am I hungry?”
If the answer is no, do not eat!
Sounds simple, but this one actually takes a bit of practice…umm at least it did for me. - H2Oh I’m full: Drink a glass of water ten minutes before sitting down to eat. And then, keep drinking that clear, liquid gold throughout your meal. It will help you feel fuller, ergo, eat less…hopefully.
- Slow down, they don’t love you like I love you: Beyoncé is right, slow down, food does not love you as much as you love you! Eating slower by giving each bite a few extra chews and putting down your fork, knife, chopsticks or whatever utensil you use, between bites, will give your food more time to travel to your stomach and you will feel satiated sooner.
- Rabbit food right up front: Eat those greens, those yellows, those reds and all those other rainbow colors too! (ROY-G-BIV for you to live!..P.S those are the colors of the rainbow, P.P.S I just made that rhyme up). Cough* nevertheless, no matter the color, hit that salad first; it’ll take the edge off your hunger for the imminent meal.
- Pile on the protein (and fibre): Basically, protein and fibre are slow to digest, so, they make you feel fuller longer. I’ll spare you the essay on their countless other benefits. But just eat them, okay? Thanks.
- Grannie attack: This one is really not Grannie specific, but basically, a swift blow delivered rapidly to any food-promoting aggressor in your family (Auntie, Mammie, Bubby, Papi, etc.) will suffice. Why can’t they just take no for an answer?!?! Actually, don’t, don’t do this one, please. Especially if Grannie knows kung-fu.
You can also check out these 8 Holiday Eating Pitfalls to Avoid for more tips! And we’re not just linking them because they used Elf in their post just as we did, but because they’re funny, and on point!
Important note: This post is not about your size, its just about over-eating which is not healthy for anyone, irrespective of size, so, love your size and stay healthy. Self-care is self-love.
Peace, love and health in the holidays, y’all!